A World Of My Own

Just some writing πŸ˜ŠπŸ’•…..

I think maybe I live in a world of my own – a world filled with paradoxes and following your heart and imperfections and dreams, colour and crazy spontaneity and falling stars and friendship, depth and rebellion and beauty and frustration, oceans and sails and sunsets and waves, new dawns and fire and free spirits and light, shadows and truth and reality and fantasy.

A world where crazy ideas are perfectly acceptable and random things can be so beautiful that they make my soul ache. A world where every emotion is intensified and sent pulsing around my body at the speed of light until I am numb and can feel no more.

A world where perfect words fall out of an endless sky onto my page or screen or out from between my lips. A world that is both ecstatically joyous and desperately sad.

A world where I never quite feel totally present, where I’m like a character, someone with an important story to tell, just not entirely sure what it is yet. A world that is just a reflection of the real one in the deep blue of my eyes.

 

 

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Cowes Small Ships Voyage/Race 2018

Every time I step onto anΒ Island Trust boat, every time I sense the presence of the ocean all around me, hear the voice of the skipper, see the faces of my future crewmates – all a little shy, but visibly glowing with excitement and the wild sea breeze – every time, I feel like I’ve come home.

Note: all photos are either by my friend Izzi or The Island Trust, unless otherwise stated πŸ™‚

It’s been an intense week, starting in Plymouth and sailing down to the Isle of Wight to take part in the Cowes Small Ships Race. We spent the eight days onboard Pegasus soaked to the skin, freezing cold, flying across the waves at ten knots with our guard rail in the water, miles from land and battered by the elements. And yet it’s been the best week of my life because, in the midst of all that, I’ve found purpose, true friendship, exhilaration and strength I never knew I had. This experience has made me feel lucky to be alive.

This voyage has only fueled my love for sailing and strengthened my wish to share my experience and all its many benefits with others. Thanks to the inspiration and encouragement provided by the crew, my new friends and personally feeling the effects that voyages like these have, I now have an even greater desire to pursue a future in sail training.

πŸ’•

We came ninth outta twenty-three overall, but got awards for Best On Parade and Youngest Crew.

THANK YOU, THE ISLAND TRUST!!

Shadows And Promises

There are shadows that don’t match their shape,
Promises that were only ever made.
Not kept.

Waves come crawling back to the shore,
On their hands and knees and full of remorse,
They can’t go back.
Not any more.

One day, people will wake up and open their eyes,
Hollowness will fill up and chemistry will override,
And life will go on.

Maybe we’ll stop doing things whilst not really knowing why,
Stop sitting in the dark and spark a fire.
Maybe we’ll set light to our hearts and learn how to truly love.
Maybe…

And I’ll look out for you because, for a reason I don’t even know,
the perfect, hazy memory of you fills my soul.
And I need you.
I need you so bad.

I think of all the nights I’ll cry
because I don’t have the answer,
or the reason why.
And that destroys me.

I dream of shadows that don’t match their shape,
Promises that are only made,
Never kept.
And I need you.
I need you so bad.