Playground Swings

 

Playground Swings – a poem

**all photo credits to my sister**

silence
a child’s cry
they both call me to this place of familiarity
at different times
I think it’s
the security of a soft landing
the comfort of children playing
the simplicity of just saying
or
or it’s the lonely poeticness of a playground when it’s empty,
the cold, quiet paradox of a place like this in silence.
and something about the way
I can always smile here

thinking out loud on playground swings,
these creaking chains are the only ones that will ever set me free,
and yet still I’m trapped,
torn back down to earth
by the limits of my wings,
I want to fly higher
and I will
never quite knowing
stomach lurching
you will catch me when I’m falling
right?

Hood up
pulled over my face like a shadow
legs stretched to the sky
lips and mind searching for the ‘why’
in everything

my fingers are getting cold
kinda slipping
letting go
I’ve been here too long
nostalgia
memories burn holes
in your pocket
matches set fire to the past
then watch as flames destroy souls
and poetry is composed
and the future is all they leave us
covered in ash
so close and yet so far away

the wind blows in my face
just reminding me of its power
I rise and fall like the waves
and I can do nothing
yet I still strike out for the shore
and swim
but sometimes I am torn between
the devil and the deep blue sea
and sometimes
the mystery of the horizon
is too beautiful
and I fill the ocean with my tears
whilst the tide takes me
and I have to decide whether to fight
or to let go.

but I am stronger
I am stronger
than anyone knows
and I will sing a song
my song
and people will hear me
and they will lean over the fence and listen
and I will be a child on a playground swing again

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To The Boy With Real Courage

Just had to share this xx

I saw a teenage boy at the pool with his mum and his sister today and I was like ‘aw, that’s so sweet’ that he came swimming with his family, most boys that age that I know wouldn’t even dream of doing that. So then I keep doing my lengths and when I get back to the shallow end, I see his mum getting out some bright orange armbands and suddenly he’s putting them on and I’m like ‘what?!’ because my brain was having a hard time processing this. He’s climbing into the pool and kinda visibly shaking like he’s super scared and his mum and sister are really encouraging and supporting him. He doesn’t look embarrassed at all – just terrified, but kinda super focused at the same time.

So he gets in the pool and he’s taking tiny steps and he looks really afraid, but he’s doing it and his family are helping him and he seems so determined and I’m swimming along smiling ’cause that’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve seen in awhile. That is true courage.

 

2018 – The Year Of The Ship

2018. Where do I even start?

I’ve honestly been staring at this screen for over six minutes and I still have no idea. So much has happened this year and it’s all going through my head right now and I can’t even….it’s just….a whole year is such a long time and I’ve changed so much and experienced so much and I don’t know how to begin explaining that.

I’ve called this post The Year Of The Ship because that’s what it is in my mind. Sailing ships and friendships ☺️ here goes….

Life’s weird. I wasn’t expecting to go on a sailing voyage and come back like ‘Bam, I know what I’m gonna do with my life now’ but hey, that’s what happened! That first trip sparked my love for sailing and the ocean and the whole seafaring way of life and I realised that I could use this to make a difference. 

I’ve been on three voyages since and, in total, have spent a whole month at sea this year! I’ve met some of my best best best friends and have completely and irreversably fallen in love with sailing and sail training.

This year has been really hard and full of challenges.  I feel as though major changes are constantly being thrown at me. Teenage life isn’t easy as I’m sure many of you well know and trying to juggle relationships, my future, feelings, new responsibilities and changing the world is pretty demanding, ya know? 😉 

I honestly think 2019 has made me a completely different person and that I’ve changed so much, in a positive way, for sure 🙂 

I think I’ve finally found a world I belong in and at the same time, a way to make a difference. I feel both lost and found, if that makes sense. As if I’ve found a place and people to belong to and yet I’m still searching and still trying to make the world a better place. 

I also just want to mention all the amazing people I’ve had the pleasure of meeting and spending time with this  year – blogging friends, real life friends, the crew of Pegasus voyage 1 & 2, the crew of Alba Explorer and all my Small Ships Race mates. 

2018 hasn’t been an easy year for anyone and I’m so so so proud of everyone for getting through it and being the incredible people that I know. Love ya all. Stay strong. 

I think that pretty much sums up my unsum-up-able year lol. To listen to my soundtrack for 2018 click here for a playlist I made for a few friends. It’s full of all the songs that mean the most to me and I’d love for you to give it a listen 💕 

How has your 2018 been? What’s been the most important thing to you this year? Would you say that you’ve changed a lot? Did you listen to the playlist? 

 

 

Set The World On Fire🔥 + Announcements!!

 

The girl stared at the sky. Above her, thousands of birds danced to the rhythm throbbing through her headphones, the sunset reflected in the deep blue of her eyes. “It’s coming” she whispered. “It’s really coming”

People rushed past her, streaming into or out of the huge shopping centre that towered above them. She stood there, amongst this midst of consumerist frenzy, managing to look perfectly at home and out of place all at the same time. A knowing smile fixed on her lips, she turned and disappeared into the crowds.

The boy in the black hoodie watched her go, but made no attempt to follow her. Tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he raised his eyes to the sky.

The birds had gone.

He made his way over to a park bench on a square of scraggly grass surrounded by concrete, home to a decrepit looking tree. He sat there, waiting.

Within a couple of minutes, a girl and boy squeezed onto the bench beside him. A lock of the girls flaming red hair tumbled out from beneath her hood as she bent to stare at her boots and the boy’s dark skin shone in the evening light. Neither of them spoke.

“Murmur says it’s coming.” the boy turned to the others, eyes burning, blonde hair spiked with passion and grim excitement. The girl returned his gaze.

“Tiree..”

He saw his own hope echoed in her eyes and had to bite back a grin. “This is it, Nance, this is it.”

The other boy threw his head back and laughed. The rose gold glow of the sky made his face shine like a bronze angel.  “Let’s set the world on fire” his voice was thick with intent and anticipation.

The girl smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Are we ready for this, boys?”

They both nodded and with that the three of them rose in perfect synchrony and were gone. 

The rest of the world had no idea of what was to come.

What do you think, guys? If you want to hear more, let me know…

Now….some announcements! First off, go VOTE in Megan’s Best of 2018 Contest! You can nominate all your favourite blogs, bloggers and posts of this year 😊

Also, I’m going to be open for guest posting/collabing in the new year so if you’d be interested, fill out the contact form below with details. Please only contact me if we know each other already. To give you some ideas, I’d be up for posts about making a difference, opinions, lifestyle, poetry, writing, anything along those lines.

 

 

 

I think that’s it! Did you vote in Megan’s contest? Interested in collaborating? Were you intrigued by ‘Set The World On Fire’? 🔥

 

 

Be A Little ‘Sadder’

Disclaimer: this post could be seen as a bit controversial. I just want to begin by saying that I’m not blaming anyone, I’m simply sharing my experiences and opinions and, as always, feel totally free to comment below if you disagree. I would love to hear your thoughts.

In our society so many positive things are labeled as negatives. Putting effort into something or taking it seriously is seen as ‘lame’ and having a dream and putting all your heart into following it is seen as ‘sad’.

I have had many experiences of people telling me that something I’ve done or made or that something I strongly believe in is ‘cringy’. Who are they to tell me that?

They don’t understand the motivation and dedication it takes to get up and go to work every day of your summer holidays to fund for something you love to do. They don’t understand the reason that you take your education seriously and the mindset of doing something to the best of your ability because you learn from it and you can be proud of what you’ve achieved.  To do something to help someone else because we need more kindness in this world.  To put your soul into making our society a better place to live in when you could just care about yourself.  To them that’s uncool. It’s lame. It’s sad.

They don’t understand what it’s like to love something so much that it hurts. To think of it during every moment, to dream of it day and night. To want to dedicate your life to it. To be willing to work hard and sacrifice to get where it is that you want to go.

I look at those people who call me sad or lame and I think about whose future looks brighter. Mine or theirs? I feel sad for people who don’t take anything seriously, who believe that life is a joke because that is what their life will be. One big joke. We will be following our dreams, making a difference and living our lives the way we have created them and they will have missed out on that because of their ignorant perceptions.

I feel sad and angry. People’s lives could be so much more. They could be so much better.

So be a little ‘sadder’, don’t be afraid of being called ‘lame’. All I’m asking is that we change the way we think a little bit, rewind and ask ourselves ‘Why are we calling that lame? Why is that sad?’ Often the things we dismiss or label are priceless, beautiful things that we can learn a lot from if we really take the time.

Please comment and share! I believe that this is a really important issue for our society to become aware of and I would love to hear what you think? 

 

Bike Photoshoot (Featuring Me™ and My Sister)

 

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So in this post you get to admire the magnificent modeling + photography skills of me and my lil’ sister Irys 😂 Something that I love doing is messing around on my bike on the farm, whizzing down hills, wind in my hair, especially in the cold and rain for some reason??

Anyway, enjoy!

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What you don’t see is that I was literally just about to fall off as that photo was taken haha.

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Irys is the main photographer, but I did get a few cool pics of her 🙂

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Epic, dramatic wizard pose…

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You have no idea how much skill it takes to cycle like that 😂

 

So much fuuuun 😆

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Cowgirl vibes 🤠😄

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My handiwork #proud

 

Totally not in hysterics 🤣

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Gracie?? Take a sensible photo?? Must be ill 😁

 

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Irys thinks ‘blurred is absurd’. However, I strongly disagree. I believe ‘blurred is beautiful’ 😆😍

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I saved the best ’til last lol. I think you can tell from my face that this was a whole lotta fun.

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Moving On

I’m sorry for my silence…I know it’s been a while. Autumn is well and truly here now and winter is definitely feeling close. Life is very cold and summer is long gone.

We’re leaving where we live in a couple of weeks. I look around me and I see my home, the only home (other than the open road) that I can remember. I see the ghosts of warm summer nights under the stars with my best friends, campfires glowing in the dark, a million mudfights, ten years worth of childhood adventures and stories. I could walk around this place blindfolded, I know it a hundred times better than any other place in the world because, for an entire decade, these woods and fields and rivers and buildings, were my world.

But life goes on and things change and now I’m leaving it behind. I’m ready to move on – we all are, but I’ll still miss it. A part of my heart lies here and always will. The child that I was belongs to this place. From the barely five year old to the almost fifteen year old, she belongs here – climbing trees and running wild, blissfully content and free.

I am ready for the future, full of dreams and plans, I’m filled with excitement at the prospect of going out into the world and doing something to make a difference….

How are you all? How’s life going? Any big plans or changes happening for you guys? What does December and the new year hold for you? 

{Messin’ With A Camera and Some Words}

I’ve taken some kinda aesthetic photos recently. Not a photographer, but I like messing around with my phone camera so yeah, guys, enjoy…

I tell the sunset that I miss you. I tell it how my heart aches and how, if the blue of the sky was a little deeper, it could be an upside-down ocean.

 

~sparkler wizard in his element~

What the mirror sees is what I forget – wild hair and cowgirl jeans. Bracelets up one arm, a metallic road spanning bruised skin stretched over muscle, swimmer’s muscle. Swimmer’s bruises. This is me. 

Fire and noise call me from afar. The drums feel like a revolution. There are crowds, but all I see are hands, tucked in pockets, reaching for the sky, for the fireworks that explode above their heads, just out of reach. Beautiful, but fleeting and no one’s to keep. There’s smoke, but all I see are flames, leaping through the air towards me. They call me, set my soul on fire. There’s sparks that burn my heart and it….it makes me feel alive.

Cars pass like moments, seconds even. Things we wanted to say, but….never did. Times when we turned our unspoken words into sighs….wrote the text message, but deleted it before we pressed send. Talked to the stars. Hid our feelings in metaphors and rhymes. I’m guilty. Another car past.

Stop! Don’t run into the fire, don’t burn, don’t follow the crowd, don’t be hypnotised by the flames, listen to my warning in the dark. Please.

“Mummy, the sky’s on fire.” 

I like talking to the sky. I tell it how I feel and then that I don’t know what to feel. I tell it that I don’t know what to say and it listens. I sing in the car because it makes me feel powerful. Just like when I’m in the water, I feel like I’m on top of the world, but I’m not. I feel the light above me and I fight my way up. 

Music I Love 🤟🎶 (A Tag)

Heyo people 💙

I saw this tag on my good friend Ruby’s blog and I thought it would be an amazing way to share the music I love with you guys.

Rules: 

  • Thank the person who tagged you and link back to their blog.
  • Share the tag graphic – sorry, sadly I couldn’t manage to get this onto here :/
  • Link to the original blogs ( Scribes & Archers and Of Rainy Days and Stardust Veins)
  • Answer the questions (I made up some of my own too #sneakyyy)
  • Tag 5 bloggers and give them 10 questions to answer (or just pass on the questions you got)

What is your favourite song?

Had to pick three, sorry not sorry 😉

I find it really hard to explain why I love songs so much, but these are just….I don’t know…the lyrics, the feels, the memories they bring back 😍 I will never get tired of listening to these.

What song defines you as a person?

I have to admit to loving Disney music maybe slightly more than I should??? And everything about this song is so me 😁

What song brings back memories? (I made this question up, but I really wanted to answer it #rebel) 

Every time I hear this song it takes me straight back to my sailing trip in Scotland last summer. I made some of my best friends and learnt so much. If any of you are reading this now…. 🤗…and keep seshing 😉

Just summer and dancing madly☀️🎶

What song takes your breath away?

This beautiful, heart-breaking piece sing by my amazingly talented friend Elm is just 😍😮😭

Favourite song from a musical?

Rebellion. Revolution. One of the best movies ever made 😍🤯

I cannot remember a time when I didn’t want to be Calamity Jane 😂

Me and my Dad love watching Oliver! and this song will always make me smile 🙂

What is a song that you can’t help but love?

Just love this ❤️

Lol, this song is so crazy, but so perfect 🤟👌

What’s one song you can’t help but dance to?

*starts dancing* 💃

*dances even more* 💃💃💃

What’s a song you can’t help but sing to?

Know all the words #proud 😝

What is a song that makes you cry?

Oh my god….😭

So so sad, but so powerful as well 👌😢

 

This just hits home for me….and the video as well…😭😍 Also it reminds me of my friends in Scotland 🙂

I cry every single time. So emotional.

All round amazing song?  

Woah, so good. 🤯 So good 🎶 This is music, people 👍

A recent discovery, but I love it 👏

Another fave 🤟

Such an underrated song, but so fun and full of energy with great lyrics ☀️

I tag whoever feels like doing this! It’s super fun. Let me know if you do this tag. Did you listen to any of these? What did you think? What are some of your fave songs?